Joane Goulding

Founder of the Goulding SleepTalk Method

photo of Joane Goulding founder of the sleeptalk methodJoane Goulding, a highly accomplished and internationally renowned educator, is the visionary behind the SleepTalk Method, an innovative solution for parents seeking to assist their children in overcoming various challenges. Joane started the development of SleepTalk back in the 1970s, and by 1979, she had established formal professional training programs, marking the inception of her global mission to share SleepTalk. Her journey led her to many different countries and participate in international conferences and professional trainings, where she shared her insights with parents and other professional from around the world. Throughout her extensive experience, Joane has encountered numerous questions about the SleepTalk Goulding Method. Below, you'll find answers to the FAQs about SleepTalk.  More about Joane Goulding

FAQs

Joane Goulding Answers 50 Frequently Asked Questions

Some of the questions were quite lengthy and have had the heading shortened.
When that has happened, the full question that was asked has been included above the answer.
photo of Joane Goulding, founder of the Goulding SleepTalk Method

What is SleepTalk?

A. SleepTalk is an alternative and substance-free, self-help process for parents coping with a challenging child. Sometimes a lack of knowledge or support can cause parents to doubt their parenting abilities, feel misunderstood and go on a merry-go-round of endless…

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Please explain how SleepTalk helps create “Emotional Health?

A. Emotional health in childhood, in my opinion is the key to future happiness. Australian national paper, ‘The Observer’, reported that Lord Richard Layard, Emeritus Professor of Economics at the London School of Economics (LSE) and his colleagues at the…

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Why did you develop SleepTalk?

A. My personal story will answer this question! In 1966 my first born, Michelle, was everything I had ever wanted. She seemed well and happy and gurgled happily like most babies do. When her sister arrived 13 months later, I…

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What was the turning point with Michelle?

A. Michelle had been assigned to a new school and by a stroke of good fortune the local authorities had lost all the papers relating to her past so she was admitted to this school with a clean slate. There…

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What made you realise that something could be done for Michelle?

A. It was the mid to late 70’s and Jim’s curiosity about how the unconscious mind worked was infectious. Jim was a Clinical Hypnotherapist and together we explored the power of the unconscious and how the unconscious registers our experiences….

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Was the circus paddock when you began to develop SleepTalk?

A. After the circus paddock, I refused to believe that there was no help for Michelle and started to ask, “what if?” I rejected the negative suggestions of the professionals as I planned and investigated alternatives. I activated the oldest…

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When did you realise that the method was helping Michelle?

A. It was one morning after we had used the process for a few weeks. Michelle was coming into the kitchen for breakfast and I found myself anticipating another angry and disconnected outburst when she walked into the room. All…

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How is Michelle now?

A. I’m delighted to tell you the end result! Although Michelle still has an intellectual and emotional IQ of around 45, and she still has to deal with the physical impairments of cerebral palsy and dyspraxia, she has been happily…

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Tell me more about Dr. Norman Doidge’s work in the area of Neuroplasticity

A. Neuroplasticity is a subject that greatly interests me. I came across Dr: Norman Doidge’s book The Brain That Changes Itself in 2010. Dr Doidge has a very impressive background: he is a Psychiatrist, Psychoanalyst and Researcher on the faculty…

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Would all children benefit from SleepTalk?

A. Most children have problems — or at the very least, “doubts” — so my answer is yes. Some parents say, “But my child doesn’t have any problems”, however children often don’t share their problems with others, especially not their…

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What would you say are the worst things that parents say to their children?

A. Most parents I’ve talked to admit that sometimes they say things to their child that they don’t mean or later regret saying. According to American Psychotherapist Antonia Van Der Meer, a parent’s temporary loss of control may, unfortunately, mean permanent…

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So SleepTalk allows parents to change negative suggestions or situations?

A. Yes, absolutely! From the moment of birth and even before, professionals now believe that thoughts, feelings, reactions and memories are registered in the deep unconscious mind, and those memories, with the accompanying thoughts, feelings, emotions and reactions, will last…

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Can SleepTalk assist with Behaviour Management like Autism or ODD?

Q. What areas of behaviour management can this method assist children with? For example, can it assist Autism or the controversial Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)? A. Yes it can! The Autism spectrum is actually very wide because there are many…

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How does SleepTalk deal with issues like education, stress and anxiety?

A. Some of the positive feedback we have received over the past years has been posted on the testimonials page. You’ll find testimonials about children and families dealing with aggression, poor behaviour management, stress, fear, anxiety, and trauma. It also…

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Does it matter if only one parent does SleepTalk?

A. In this day and age this is not as straight forward question as it may seem. Generally, it’s better for both parents to be involved since the child develops their sense of self-worth and self-acceptance from both parents. Sometimes…

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When there is a stepmother or stepfather, what happens regarding the absent partner?

Q. When there is a stepmother or stepfather, what happens then to the basic script regarding the absent partner? Since the child’s basic self-image comes from both parents it is important that the child is comfortable loving both parents without…

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What happens if the non-custodial parent is restricted in terms of access?

Q. What happens if the non-custodial parent is restricted in terms of access? Doesn’t that cause conflict with the method? A. Initially its possible confusion may occur but the method will in fact assist the child to manage the situation….

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What happens if one parent doesn’t love the child?

Q. What happens if one parent doesn’t love the child? Aren’t you lying to the child? A. What right does one person have to assume that the ex-partner or absent partner doesn’t love that child? What right has one parent…

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What happens if a marriage breaks up or one person moves away or dies?

Q. What happens if a marriage breaks up or one person moves away or dies, and one parent is left very preoccupied with their own resentments, hurt or guilt? They tell the child negative stories about the parent who has…

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What if a parent is not living with the family and has personally abused the child?

Q. If a parent is not living with the family and has personally abused the child either physically or emotionally – do you still say present the basic foundation suppressions? Won’t the child conclude then that abusive behaviour is okay?…

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What about dysfunctional families?

Q. What about dysfunctional families? For example, where a parent is abusing a child and the other parent doesn’t know? What happens then? A. This is of course a very difficult situation that does occur. The method will however enable…

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Does the Goulding SleepTalk Method work with children who don’t have concerns or problems?

Q. Does the Goulding Method work with children who don’t have concerns or problems? And what benefits would they gain? A. Absolutely, the Goulding Method assists and benefits all children absolutely everybody. The recipients of the method do not necessarily…

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What about asthma? Can the Goulding Method assist?

A. All asthma issues are complicated. Sometimes it’s a psychological reaction to a major anxiety, which may even indicate a fear of life or death. Symptoms of asthma and the subsequent physiological reaction may in fact be caused by a…

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What happens if my child is fine except for nail-biting?

A. There are a number of issues needing to be addressed here. Is the nail-biting just a habit, a learned behaviour, or a symptom of anxiety? Removing the ‘effect’ of nail-biting without dealing with the possible underlying ‘cause’ may result…

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Can you work with multiple issues at the same time?

A. The first priority is to establish acceptance of the Foundation suggestions and introduce the Unit Two bridging suggestions to ensure consolidation of those suggestions before moving forward. Once parents receive positive feedback that the Foundation suggestions (which create the…

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Is there a specific “Primary Area of Need” suggestion for anxiety?

Q. Is there a specific ‘Primary Area of Need’ suggestion you would use if there was a general anxiety or conflict or concern about going to school? A. Yes there is. Concerns about going to school indicate a lack of…

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What happens if they have a fear of someone?

A. A very difficult question but a very important one. Suggestions presented during the Method will last for life. Later in life it might be appropriate for their child to be frightened of the teacher or some other confronting person…

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How would you describe the child who awakens easily?

Q. How would you describe the child who awakens very easily, has difficulty going to sleep, or is often awake throughout the night? A. Very anxious. The Goulding Method should be able to help but it may be difficult the…

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What happens if it is an unhappy or a sad day for the child?

Q. The Goulding Method includes phrases about a happy day. What happens if it is an unhappy or a sad day for the child? Won’t that cause conflict? A. No, not really because whatever the events of the day, it…

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What happens if more than one child is sleeping in the room?

A. This is not a problem because parents can present the Goulding Method with both/all children, and all children gain from utilising their full potential. And there is no limit to the number of times it’s appropriate to tell someone…

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How early can you start presenting the Goulding Method?

Q. What about a very young child? How early can you start presenting the method? A. When does a child understand language? A very young child may understand by the tone of what is being said rather than the words….

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Does the unconscious mind of a foetus pick up on the mother’s emotions?

A. That depends on your personal philosophy of whether or not you believe there’s a connection of minds prior to a child’s birth. Feedback and research received over the years indicate that the Method can be used with a child…

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Is there any difference in the basic process when working with a child who is “impaired”?

Q. Is there any difference in the basic Method when working with a “normal” child to that with working when a child who is intellectually, physically or emotionally impaired? A. What actually constitutes a “normal” child as all children experience…

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What happens if either parent feels uncomfortable working with the method?

A. Mums or the female energy tend to be more in favour or perhaps be more comfortable with presenting the Goulding Method and in some cases the male energy of the home may tend to be reluctant, especially the older…

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Would you explain in more detail what you mean by “feedback”?

A. ‘Feedback’ means identifying a change in behaviour or communication. After presenting the Foundation Statement of the Goulding Method, it’s important to determine the child’s acceptance of the Foundation suggestions by asking a direct question during the day such as,…

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Would you tell the child that you are presenting the Goulding Method?

A. No, never. The conscious critical analysis would interfere and might negate the parent’s efforts. Also, encouraging parents to present some of the basic suggestions throughout the waking hours will help to reinforce acceptance. It is one thing to present…

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What happens if the child awakens when doing the Goulding Method?

A. That is not a problem as long as the parent doesn’t panic and creates more anxiety. Just continue with the basic suggestions. The reaction of a child awakening during the presenting is possibly one of anxiety, but in most…

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Does it matter if sounds can be heard when presenting the Goulding Method?

Q. Does it matter if sound can be heard or the radio or the TV is on when presenting the Goulding Method? A. Yes it does. It’s very important that any conversation, television, radio or communication of any type is…

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Some children live regimented orderly lives, would the Goulding Method help them?

A. Yes definitely. Some children, who relate well to organised structured lives, sometimes have more difficulty adapting to a crisis or major changes than those from apparently “dysfunctional” environments. Sometimes they are unable to cope with unpredictability issues because they…

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If a parent has died, does that parent still get named?

Q. What about when the child is old enough to comprehend the death of one parent. Does that parent still get named? A. Just because the parent has died, doesn’t mean that the child needs to feel the loss of…

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If a child is always happy, how can feedback be assessed?

A. Parents need to be very sensitive to the changes occurring with their child. If always happy then allow at least the basic timeframe of 3 months to ensure that the Foundation suggestions are accepted. Subtle feedback will be available…

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Is the Goulding SleepTalk Method the same as hypnosis?

A. No. The only thing the Goulding Method and hypnosis have in common is that they both use suggestions. Hypnosis is presented by a professional while the child is awake and has conscious memory of the presentation of suggestions. The…

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Should parents repeat the suggestions during the day?

A. Yes. It would be very beneficial to repeat the basic Foundation script and/or the Specific Suggestions during the day as this will help to reinforce the positive suggestions. ~   See More Testimonials for SleepTalk Find Out the FAQs…

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How do I speak so I don’t wake the child up?

A. Just speak softly and slowly in a low steady tone. Do NOT whisper, as whispering may cause the child to wonder what is occurring and they might awaken because their subconscious mind is always listening even when appearing to…

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Can I use SleepTalk during afternoon naps?

Can I use the Goulding SleepTalk Method during afternoon naps? A. Yes, especially if difficulty is experienced at sleep time. ~   See More Testimonials for SleepTalk Find Out the FAQs about SleepTalk   Go to top The SleepTalk eBook…

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Does it matter how far away I stand?

A. No, not really; you just need to be within physical contact and hearing distance. Remember, you are talking softly. However, if you child is very sensitive and awakens as you enter the room and you can’t get close, you…

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What age is puberty?

A. The age varies but the primary indications of puberty in the female child are the onset of menstruation and body shape changes. The male child will notice changes taking place in their physical body such as body and facial…

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What if there are two children in the room?

Q. What if there are two children in the room do I say the Foundation Process twice? Do I mention their names, singling them out? A. If two children are in the room, both will hear, so only needs to…

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What if both parents are involved in presenting the method?

Q. What if parents are involved in presenting the Method, do both present it on the same evening or do they alternate? A. The Method only needs to be carried out once per night. Parents or carers should alternate.  …

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What happens if parents cannot get a reaction from the sleeping child?

What happens if parents cannot get a reaction from the sleeping child, do go ahead anyway or try later? A. If the parent doesn’t observe a transition response, just continue anyway. The deep unconscious will still hear, even if the…